Friday, February 29, 2008

Latest Clinton dispatch:
To: Interested Parties
From: Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf, Clinton Campaign Spokesman (aka Baghdad Bob)
Date: Friday, February 29, 2008
RE: Obama Must Succeed

The media has anointed Barack Obama the presumptive nominee and he's playing the part.

With an eleven state winning streak coming out of February, Senator Obama is riding a surge of momentum that has enabled him to pour unprecedented resources into Texas, Ohio, Rhode Island and Vermont.

Senator Obama has campaigned hard in these states. He has spent time meeting editorial boards, courting endorsers, holding rallies, and - of course - making speeches.

If he cannot win all of these states with all this effort, there's a problem.

If he cannot halt global warming by Monday, there's problem.

If he cannot reverse the bursting of the housing bubble before the polls open on March 4, there's a problem.

If he cannot find the missing RNC emails prior to Easter, there's a problem.

If he cannot raise Norman Mailer from the dead before the Pennsylvania primary, there's a problem.

Democrats, the majority of whom have favored Hillary in the primary contests held to date, have their doubts about Senator Obama and are having second thoughts about him as a prospective standard-bearer.


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By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3/03/2008 6:52 PM  

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