On the California ballot:

From the Official Voter Information Guide:

Trek Thunder Kelly
Independent
1320 Pacific Avenue, Venice, CA, 90291
310.452.3264, trek@trekkelly.com, www.trekkelly.com

Dear Voters, Please vote for me, thus breaking the Seventh Seal and incurring Armageddon. I will legalize drugs, gambling, and prostitution so they may be taxed and regulated, the funds derived would subsidize the deficit, education, and the environment. I believe in peaceful resolutions backed by a strong military; I don't care who you marry of have sex with.

posted by Quiddity at 10/07/2003 10:06:00 AM